It had to happen to us soon: the nanny disappearing with cash that was entrusted to her while we were away in Jakarta on business.

Thank goodness it was just some cash and not other items such as laptop, computer, Nintendo Wii, the DVD player or other electronic stuff.

A girl friend of mine said we should never entrust money to any of the locals. This, from someone whose husband is Indonesian, and who himself does not trust his fellow country men with money.

However, the incident left a bad taste in our mouth as this happened about a week after the other domestic help failed to return from a trip she took to her village on her off day, giving the excuse that her mother refused to let her come to work for us as we lived too far from their family home in Nusa Penida.

What had actually happened?

On the Monday morning when we were leaving for Jakarta, the nanny informs us that our motorbike license, and hers too, had expired and had to be renewed. So we gave her Rp800,000 (about S$163.85) for renewing both licenses, as we were unsure how much it would cost.

We left for Jakarta after that, and returned on Thursday night. One of the first things I did upon our return was to check if the license had been renewed.

It had not.

Next step: check the records of money spent. This was possible only because we had instructed the nanny to record the expenses made with the cash handed to her.

Entries for all days from Monday to Wednesday were fine.

Then on Thursday, there was one entry:
Salary for (her name) 20 days work, Rp700,000 (about S$90.70).

There had been an additional Rp300,000 provided to her for daily expenses such as meals and fuel for the motorbike during the period we were away. However, the amount of cash left in the folder = Rp25,000 (about S$3.20).

Upon checking, there were two entries that did not balance. One for laundry costing almost Rp100,000 (12.95) and another was salary advance of Rp150,000 (S$19.43) for the domestic help.

The first was not backed by a receipt from the laundry place, which is always given by the laundry place when we send anything there. The second was not approved by me and I was most certainly not told about this payment before it was made.

What made us upset was the way things were done.

Taking the cash meant for something else and claiming it as salary is wrong. Giving cash meant for household expenses to someone else as salary is wrong. Claiming to have used cash meant for household expenses for paying laundry is a lie.

These two Balinese girls join the ranks of unpleasant experiences we had with the other previous maids, all of whom are Balinese:
- one quit after she was too sick from her pregnancy, which was a result of a visit to her boyfriend on the first off day she had;
- one we asked to leave as she was making the house more dirty than cleaner with her cleaning;
- one took off while we were away on holiday, citing the excuse that she had diabetes and needed treatment, but later we discovered that it was because she wanted to avoid her ex-boyfriend kept coming to our home and harassing her.

If we do not allow them to have an off day, they become upset. Give them the off day and they get in to trouble or not return.

If we do not entrust them to take care of the home when we are away, we will always be afraid to travel for long. Entrust the home to them and run the risk of them inviting their partner home, even after you have set down rules about bringing their partner home.

If we do not entrust them with cash to help settle payments, we will spend a week’s time dealing with these work ourself. Entrust them with money and you risk having them steal from you.

It is hard to find trained and reliable domestic help, and even harder to retain them.

Firstly, there are no certified, established domestic staffing agencies here like those available in Singapore.

Second, there is no proper maid training agency here too.

Third, this is a country where contracts are not honoured, not even if they were signed and authenticated in front of a lawyer.

This happened two Thursdays ago. Since last Monday, we have had two ladies, who are from Java, helping around the house. It is still too early to gauge their efficiency, but we have a preference for the domestic help while we may decide on getting another nanny.

Hopefully, this time around, they will stick around for longer.